Loneliness and Contact

By Gita Saraydarian

“....loneliness creates an atmosphere of contact.” (Psyche and Psychism, Torkom Saraydarian, p. 957)

The YouTube excerpt below is a short clip from the lecture on Contact given at the Wesak Conference earlier this month (May, 2009). Since the process of contact is the theme of the Wesak celebration, I wanted to write my thoughts about the process of loneliness and contact.




In the Ancient Wisdom tradition, meditation, worship, observation, purification and other disciplines of the physical, emotional, and mental bodies are tools to enable us to make contact. Contact means to communicate with and to receive impressions from a higher level of consciousness. That consciousness can be from our own inner wisdom or in the form of our Guardian Angel, saints or other Great Ones, ideas and visions and expansive thoughtforms, or direct communications with the Higher Worlds. The objective of high level contact is to learn about higher ideas and visions, find solutions to the impasse in our lives, and to be able to express these findings in our field of service so that everyone is uplifted around us. Humanity benefits hugely from men and women who are able to articulate high level contacts in their fields of work.

What kind of contact and how these contacts are translated depends on our approach. Emptying ourselves from the “noises” of our life is a precondition or necessary aspect of making a high level contact and being able to translate it into useful and conscious decisions. High level contact and the translation of that contact through the senses of universality, right direction, and synthesis help us proceed on the path of conscious evolution and conscious adaptation.

What is that “loneliness” that Great Ones and spiritual traditions have spoken about?

In my experience, loneliness means to be isolated physically, emotionally, and mentally from all external as well as internal patterns that distract us from our essence. To become our True Self, and to express this genuine being in our daily life as well as see the True Self in others is the greatest gift we can give to ourselves and to the world.

In our everyday busy lives, we are seldom quiet and we do not like the feeling of loneliness. Being lonely makes us sad and uncomfortable, so we try to fill that space with people, activities, and all kinds of noise. We give ourselves too much to do, we keep our children moving and making appointments for play dates, we are continuously hooked onto the computer and cellphones, we cannot stand not to talk to someone or be with someone. We do not want to be quiet and empty; we fear it.

I notice a man taking a brisk walk in the morning all the while speaking on his cell phone! A woman is taking time out to have her nails done, and she is talking loudly on the cellphone; no one in the salon can relax and have a brief time of relaxation and quiet. Two women are walking holding their toddlers and one of the children is holding a cellphone to his ear talking! I have a lunch appointment with a friend and she has to answer the cellphone during our visit. We go to hear a lecture and do not hear it nor listen to it; we are too busy with a problem circulating in our mind. Everything we hear and experience is colored by that one issue, one problem. We cannot let go even for a minute. It goes on and on in every part of our life. We cannot stand to “waste one minute” of time: so we eat at our desks, we are on the cell phone while we drive and walk and exercise, we constantly stuff ourselves with news, articles, and information. We want to fill every minute with multiple activities. Even at work, we must “catch” the news, check online, watch that video, and we are so proud of our abilities to do multiple tasks and do not realize the damage we do to our spiritual life. We are crazed and have no clue that we are.

The result is increased stress and strain and the inability to be focused and careful and make an internal connection that is the most essential part of our life. Then, in a rare moment when we feel sadness, pain, or loneliness, we feel anxious and threatened and don't know what to do with this strange feeling. This problem is widespread and is not limited to the average public. We are often reminded to turn off our cell phones when we enter a church or place of worship! I am always amused at the speed in which the Lord's Prayer is said in rapid fire rhythm; quick, quick, quick and get it over with!

Yet, when we embark on a serious spiritual path, the first step we must learn is to quiet ourselves and learn to practice quiet meditation, quiet and deliberate prayer; we must learn the art and science of loneliness and emptying of ourselves from the non-essential. This is the most difficult part of serious spiritual practice. We often try not to do this and go around it as much as possible, avoiding it with spiritual noise as well as mundane noise. We will do anything not to face the emptiness and loneliness that is really our friend and our most important teacher.

In this above quote there is a profound meaning: become empty of physical noise, emotional patterns, mental patterns and go outside of these and try to find a deeper level of silence. In that silence, we could begin to hear the most essential path for our life. In trying to find solutions to our problems, to find creative ways of solving life issues, we can try to be silent and quiet and even lonely. It is in the true lonely feeling that we can finally meet with our true being, our essence, and our direction in life.

Being lonely is hard work! I know how this feels. I know the feeling inside of me when I experience it. At first, it is like a sickening feeling that does not go away; a rock inside of me that pushes me. Then, if I persist, it becomes a feeling of understanding, opening, linking, and appreciating a broader part of life that I did not see before. My heart opens and relaxes and a flood of understanding envelopes me. My sadness may not go away; I understand this and appreciate it. But my deeper realization is there and makes my decisions better. If we can maintain our poise and observe during times of loneliness, we can fill our hearts with the love and joy of the universe and realize that connection and understanding and be able to express that deep smile of knowing.

There is no short-cut. In order to find the healing, the solutions, the answers to my prayers, I have to get to a point of serious reckoning; I have to feel lonely and then I start to reach for the answers that really matter. I look outside and inside, beyond the noise and the expectations, and in that loneliness, I connect.

If we approach the idea of contact with the noise of our bodies circulating inside our mind, we will not be able to hear or understand what we should hear. We get from any experience whatever we approach it with. Our patterns, our expectations, our desires will always color our contact. In this very simple quote is a most profound discipline to help us make the greatest contact that we can reach to, and to be able to bring from that contact the deepest truth that we can understand and articulate.

I wish for you a renewed contact with your Essential Self, with the most profound meaning in your life. As we face the impasse in our lives, moments of quiet are the best ways to find the true causes and the real solutions.

Gita
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References and additional information:

-The lecture Contact is available on CD and download and DVD.
-Gita Saraydarian is the Founder and President of TSG Foundation, and TSG University spiritual training center, an organization dedicated to the Ageless Wisdom Teachings.
-See the complete list of Gita's blogs.
-For upcoming events and seminars, please see here for U.S. and International events.
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Copyright Notice: Gita’s Blog articles are copyrighted by The Creative Trust, 2009.