Wednesday, January 30, 2013

1- Love and the Meaning of Life


 A friend asked me to write about relationships. In addition to my personal relationship experiences, I have also encountered relationship issues in the lives of people who come to me for advice. I have noticed that the overwhelming issue facing all of us is the way we understand or do not understand the meaning of love. 
            Without a mature and selfless understanding of love, we cannot build right relationships. We need to cultivate a deep understanding of the mystery and power of love. Whether we want a healthier and more wholesome relationship with ourselves, a better marriage and love life, better family relations, or better relations with people in general, we must understand the mystery and power of love.
            Love is the one energy that builds our universal understanding of life. Love is not an emotion; it is not something we can choose to do without, except at our peril. When we do not feel love, we are full of hatred for the very things that we want to love. Hatred, anger, regret, sharply critical words are all masking the deep lack of love that usually begins with how we feel about ourselves.

            Everything in life is based on love. Without love, there is no life. The whole universe is built on the power and energy of love. Everything we do in life is a reflection of how we love or do not love. All the problems we have in the world are due to the lack of love.
            What is love? “Loving is an act of service. When you love somebody you give him courage; you uplift, transform and cause enlightenment in that person. You evoke creativity.”1
            We often think that love is romance, red roses and cards that say “I love you” or a nice dinner out, or any number of culturally accepted or personally desired ways of expression. In essence, love is much deeper than roses and cards and dinner or even nice words. It is an essential energy that runs in every aspect of life. And, we must give it to have it. Once we start to let the energy flow, we are doing an exceptional act of service. When we give love, it waters and fertilizes the hidden beauty in the seeds of life.
            Love cannot and must never be held hostage for anything that we give or take. Love is not a bartering tool. It is an energy that needs to flow and not be stopped. If we try to stop it, it burns us. If we deny it, we die. If we do not let it grow, vertically and horizontally, we shrink and constrict our life and relations. Only in the unimpeded flow of love, intelligently given and used, do we grow in our right human relations.
            Love begins with you. Learn the power of love in your attitudes about yourself. If you love the essence in you, then the outer will adjust to that loving presence. Then, remember, every person who is in your life is a gift from God. You need to cherish that gift in every cell of your being every minute of your life. The greatest gift we can give to ourselves and those around us is to love. The greatest vice we can commit is not to love. When we stop loving, we simply die, either in physical form or in a more painful internal ways. Even people who give you the most trouble are teaching you a most valuable lesson. Can you love the difficulty too and learn the needed lessons so that they will no longer have a hold on you?
            Who is your beloved? Your beloved is your wife, husband, child, lover, or friend. Your beloved is part of how you see yourself. Your beloved is not a separate person out there who gives you things. Your beloved is an extension of you and the karmic lessons you need to learn and heal. Your beloved is all of life.
            Love is compassionate and sees the self in all. When we see suffering in little ones, we see our little ones suffering. When we see a woman being mistreated, we think of our mothers, sisters, daughters being mistreated. When we see a man suffer, we see our fathers, husbands, sons in that face. If we are not able to see ourselves in others, we will commit any crime and heartless actions. Any action against love is ultimately going to ruin us and eventually bring us to our knees so that we appreciate the power of love.
            Our beloved does not belong to us but rather to God. Our beloved is not really the person we love, but what that person represents. Why is that person in your life? That person grinds everything in you that is against love and teaches you the mystery of love.
            Our beloved is the embodiment of the great mystery of life itself. It is a mystery so vast and so eternal that every living being is pulled toward it. It defies definition. It defies categorization. It defies limits set by our own standards. It grows because you give it. It expands if you expand the circle. It blooms in abundant joy when you give love to serve the essence. In love, you can overcome all.
            Love is God’s mystery to us; it is eternal and forever calling us to grasp it. Mystery is what makes us live and strive and search to find that perfect meaning to life. Try as we may to define and understand, the God-mystery eludes us, yet we know we cannot give up the search. The search is a powerful attractive force that eventually teaches us the meaning of life itself.

Gita Saraydarian


1. Torkom Saraydarian, Sex, Family and the Woman in Society, (2nd ed. p. 45.)
2. Gita Saraydarian is the Founder and President of TSG Foundation and TSG Spiritual University. See www.tsgfoundation.org

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2 comments:

Risha McLellan said...

Thank you

Felicity Dalton said...

Wonderful words of wisdom relevant to every situation, thank you so much, Gita.

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Gita Saraydarian
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